Going To The Space Where I Learn. Are You In?

 

Should  I be studying Astro-Physics or another Astrology Lie?  Is that teacher a Super Star or just a regular in this  Suburban Bar?  Can we get taught, not taunted or at least bought at this Bar?  If I was brought to this Bar. I could not drive home.  Speaking of Bars,  was she a Bare Nun?

That was when the bartender told me to keep it a secret.  Or did he say I should not secrete it?  He sure wants me to have a success, or was that just another suggestion for my secretions.  He said that it was my secret to run.  Or did he say that they all know I got the runs?

One time he told me that I am Charles.  Or was it that for me he could not Charge Less?  Maybe he told me I was Chair Less?  Or just that I am always Care Less?  Everyone else keeps telling me that I am a head of us.  I did not know that I really am  Hairless.  And not Harmless.  I sure can’t think less.  He said “You can’t stink less!”

All along the time, me and my buddies are shaking hands while the bartender is shaking drinks and the girls that walk by are shaking their heads.  I kept looking at what else they were shaking. 

Fred then asked me, “Did I just miss the last call?”

And I looked at the phone and asked Ed, “Was that a missed call?”

Ed looked at me and told me, “No!  What you heard was a fog horn!”

Then Fred asked, “So, Ed, how much did that frog earn?”

I said, “He really acts earnest.”

Ed then said, “At my job, it is like I must constantly Earn A Nation.”

I told Ed, “My Actions Speak Louder Than Your Words.”

And Ed replied, “You Adding Factions Freaks You Out with these Weirds.”

I then turned on my stool and told Frank, “All I want to learn about is The Solar System, The Moon, The Stars, The Planets.”

Frank said, “You don’t need to be Spaced Out anymore.”

Ed said, “He can’t be Spaced Out any less.”

I said, “How can I learn how to get to Pluto?  I need to think more than about Biology.  I need Chemistry.  I don’t want Geology. But I do want Geometry!  I want to be able to count!!  I want to be counted on!  I am the Count of Coma Sutra.  I want to learn Numerology!  Or do I need to be Numbing More Of Me?”

Frank asked, “Are you really wanting Mathematics or did you just say ‘Ma, Them Antics’?”

Ed answered, “He sure is Mad as a Hatter but I’m just Glad I’m a Hater.”

I commented, “You’re a Hater.  There’s a Hater.  All over there are Haters, Haters, Haters.  Man, this Home really wasn’t built in a day but we just roam around a bunch of silt in clay.”

Frank then said to Ed, “Are you going to Bury the Hatchet in my Neck?”

Ed replied, “It ain't over 'till it's over.”

Frank reacted, “I ain’t Orvile!  Spill it over.“

Ed, “Practice makes perfect.”

Frank, “Artifacts mase prefect.”

Ed, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

Frank, “You jerks and all you say makes my Life without Joy.”

Ed, “Silence is golden.”

Frank, “Violence is Olden.”

Ed, “The squeaky wheel gets the grease.”

Frank, “You sneaky weasels cut the cheese.”

Ed, “You're never too old to learn.”

Frank, “You are never too smart to not burn.”

Ed, “What's good for the goose is good for the gander.”

Frank, “What you say is gross and you go on forever.”

Ed, “ One man's meat is another man's poison.”

Frank, “One man’s mate is another man’s prison.”

Ed, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

Frank, “Air scents make your farts go around more.”

I then said, ”Hey guys!  Calm yourselves Down!  I think you need Calmer Suture!

It’s always Gas Light, Gas Fight, yous are The First Gases I Smelt Tonight.  I wish I could have missed this Day.  I wish I missed your Fight.  You moan and hiss, I miss delight.”

               Ed then said, “Are you saying we Messed up soap pains in your gaul?”

               Frank agreed, “Gaulumetric or a galuga or even a beluga, you add up to the one we met during a trick.”

               The bartender then brought us a round and stated, “Tether around, boys.  Are those your Dentist’s shoes?”

               Ed answered, “ No, I thought they were your Tennis shoes.”

               I let them know, “No way!  Those are some Dennis’s shoes! “

               And then, all of the sudden Colonel Hoggin DeSpotlit told us, "We're lost, but were making good time."

And that caused a reaction by Kirkjadant Stink, "I know none of you were expecting this. I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to throw up a little sooner. Warp 5, Hoggin."

Colonel Hoggin DeSpotlit stated, "So much for the cute little girl there."

Colonel Hoggin DeSpotlit then said, "May I remind the captain that if a good looking woman enters this zone..."

Sergeant Had Schlitz interrupted, "I'm aware of my responsibilities, Mister."

The Demander then said, “This is Kirkadant Stink.  I am the one causing damage of the Star Stallage Thirteen.  Soused, I finally got here.  These are the rumpuses that are on the rise.  My five beer mission was to gulp strange new drinks.  To see life only as blurs.  To seek out free shots in weird situations.  To stumblingly go where no sober man had gone before.”

I then opened my eyes because I thought I heard a Barroom.  But it was just the Bar Broom.  I’m not even in the Barber Room.  Onto my head there keeps going, “Ba Boom!  Ba Boom!  Ba Boom!”  And I’m flying in the sky like a balloon.  Or am I frying as I die in this saloon?

 

                                                       I hope you had some fun with this                                                                                                                 I also hope you have some fun with THESE